Coming face to face with suffering is one of the hardest things.

Coming face to face with real suffering is one of the hardest things.When you have done all you can do to try and alleviate their pain and you feel so helpless, all you can do is cry and pour out your heart before God for them. Doesn't matter how many times you see the injustice of suffering. It doesn't get easier. I'm thankful we believe in the God who feels....

This is Mary Chris (on the left)

This is Mary Chris

Yesterday Mary Chris and her family did not know Ron and I were going to do a house visit. When we got there we found the mother and husband of Mary sitting crying. They are heartbroken. They are all suffering.

20 year old Mary has been diagnosed with malnutrition and tuberculosis. She had been confined in hospital until the family were told by staff that "the government has run out of money for treatment" and so she was sent home with a long list of medicines and other items she was supposed to buy. Her husband Babie  works all hours collecting and cleaning plastic bottles.He is a hard worker but could not even begin to afford most of the items on that list. Yesterday he was so loving with his wife. He held her skeletal frame and kept gently rubbish her arm. He told her in front of Ron and I that she was still beautiful.

We are so grateful that several people have responded and have made it possible for us to buy the medicines, daily needs and pay for hospital fees. This was the news that we gave them yesterday. Their tears of despair turned into tears of relief and thankfulness. They said they knew God had heard their prayers after all. He saw them cry.

We were able to spend a long time with this lovely family yesterday. We have come face to face with much suffering before and I could probably count on one hand the times when we have actually cried in front of people. I personally find there is a strength that takes over and allows us to focus on trying  to help rather than be consumed by emotion. For me it's when I go to the secret place and am physically away from the site that the tears flow for them. When I go and sit with God to talk about what we have seen or cuddle up beside my husband , many times its then I feel the real burden and pain of the situation.

But when I sat face to face with Mary yesterday holding her frail hand. When I felt her skinny fingers cling onto mine and saw the pain in her beautiful but sunken eyes I could not stop myself from weeping.When I saw how she was in agony trying to move her position because of the pain of her bed sores, no words came.As we watched her do her very best to take sips of the vitamin drinks but vomited most of it straight back up, I could do nothing but sit quietly.

I felt totally and utterly useless.

We all wept and prayed together calling out to Jesus to heal her. We all cried from our hearts that God would step in and fix all that needed fixing. We all thanked God that He did hear our prayers and touched the hearts of people to respond in giving quickly.

                                                       Would you pray for this family.

I'm so glad we serve a God who feels. I know His heart beats with love for Mary Chris and her family. I know he cares.

I think of my own step dad at this time. He too is suffering greatly with cancer. I am physically far away but I know my family who have watched him fight so bravely and become so frail are hurting. I'm sure they feel helpless. I do.I know God cares.

I know our God is the only one who can change these situations.I trust that He knows best.

 I think each of us are called to do everything we possibly can to help those who are suffering.Our hearts tell us its so unjust and we are compelled to act. Yet our feelings of helplessness remind us that our efforts seem so small in comparison with one touch from Jesus.Everything in our being tells us that we need Him to step in and take over.

Please God, step in and take over.

A letter from a Rose

Have you ever been going through a time where circumstances or people could potntially really discourage you and then at the perfect moment someone or something would encourage you to the very core? 

Below is a letter written from a Rose amongst the trash. It's to a group of our ministry partners from Bransgore Community Church who are sponsoring her further education in teaching.
I asked her permission if it was OK to publish her letter here. She said yes!
Today this letter lifted my spirit and reminded me that God is at work, motivated me to continue and lifted my heart to bring to mind that lives are being changed.

 

Rosemae ready for her first day at college

Hi!



My name is Rosemae S Melendres. I’m 16 years old. I live in a dump site in Tondo, Manila. I am one of the teachers in Kids Church. I’m teaching the 7-8 years old class.

When I was 11 years old Kuya Ron (big brother) and Ate Joanna (big sister) first visit to Tondo they teaching Sunday school. I'm one of the first 12 kids in the room. If you are listening to them and if you remember what they are teaching you get points every week. If you get 5 points you get a reward bag of grocery and  I always get points. Its 5, then 10 and it become 15.Ate Joanna asked me if I become her assistant in Sunday school. When I’m 12 years old I become Ate Joannas translator. I don’t know how I can translate. I only know me and Ate Joanna  pray before we start  teaching then I understand everything she say. It’s a miracle for me because I'm only 12 years old and I don’t have a dictionary or a teacher to teach me how to understand English. I know it is a blessing from God. Now I’m teaching 7-8 years old.

Before when Ate Joanna and Kuya Ron come here the first week there are only 12 children. But it become hundreds and hundreds. Now my whole family are in church. My mother is a volunteer. She cooks in the kitchen for the children and my father is guarding the church. Another miracle.

First of all I would want to thank God to giving me a sponsor and I want to say thank you to all of you who give me a chance to study in college. I thought before that I’m not going because the income of my family is not enough to college. But God is always there for me and he know that I really want to go to college and to become a successful lady. It’s not only for me but for my parents and my brother and sisters and to help the children in our community to help them know the love of God.

I don’t know how can I give back the help that you gave to me. I don’t have anything to give back. What I only have is Jesus. I pray to him all of you and to give you a good health and better life with Jesus.

God bless you and thank you very much.

 Rosemae :)

We have had the privilege of watching Rosemae grow up into a beautiful young woman who has a heart for God and a heart for people. She has been a faithful translator and I would have been lost for words (literally) on many an occasion without her. We have watched God answer her prayers for he family as they have come to know the Lord one by one.God is so good!! We are excited to see how God will shape out an amazing future for her.

Diamonds in the dirt.

When you think of a community clean up what do you envisage?

Picking up cans and empty crisp packets? Painting over graffiti?  Black bin bags stuffed with litter along the roadside? Regular stops to have a nice cup of tea and a cream bun?

That sounds like a day out compared to the meaning of a community clean up within a dump site area.I'm really not a writer so I'm finding it hard to even think of words that properly describe the physical appearance and smells within the place. I vaguely remember at some point in primary school the teacher saying to write down all the "describing words" before you start a story. I am stumped so here goes!

BLACK, THICK, TOXIC, RANCID SMELLING GOO, HUMAN EXCREMENT,LIQUID METHANE, FERMENTED TRASH LIQUEFIED, RATS-DEAD AND ALIVE, A RIVER OF TAR LIKE MUSH, A SMELL THAT CLINGS TO YOUR BODY AND CLOTHES LIKE AN UNWANTED SICKNESS, DISEASE RIDDEN SLUDGE.

This is Kuya Dodie
His "work".....
- To dive under the toxic mush with his eyes closed feel around for the trash and unblock the drainage.
As Ron told him last week- HE IS A HERO!!

I wondered before if it sounds like we are exaggerating when we talk about the infested waters in our newsletters, but they really are infested! They seep into the church hall after it has rained for any length of time. but much worse, they pour into the homes of the children. Its hard to even begin to imagine the disease in it. We have often seen the children play in it and then come to the activities with their skin actaully peeling off or discoulred.

Every few months Ron leads some of the team to help do a "clean up". The goal is to try and make the area a bit less flood proof. Garbage blocks every crevice leaving the molten liquid trash no where to go. So at least by removing as much as they can from the drainage it helps for a while. The community always get on board. There are amazing men, women and children who come out to help. It's really a team effort!

The people  who come out to wade through the muck are diamonds. Some of the kindest people I have ever met.There is a real sense of community here in spite of all the problems. When there is tragedy and crisis they pull together. This community is so resilient.They don't just pull through- they spring back! I have witnessed them experience great loss and they don't just survive- they recover. We have seen them recover from floods and typhoons where some have them have lost every earthly possession they had. We have watched them rebuild after fires have destroyed whole rows of homes in minutes. Of course they are sad and weep over these heartaches, but I can honestly say I have never heard a moan. I have never seen the complain and say its unfair, I have truthfully never heard any of them blame God. Never.

We have learned so much from them. We came to serve them and bless them. But in actual fact they bless us. They are a constant reminder of how beauty dwells where you least expect it. They are a challenge as to whether our joy is really dependent on Jesus or our circumstances.They are a reminder that we were all in a dung heap before Jesus rescued us.

Some of our overseas volunteers have described the physical place in their own way. Here are a few;

"Its like a war zone"
"Everything is grey"
"Its the closest thing to hell on earth"
"I have been to many poor areas. This is the worst i have seen"

Strong words.

And YET the people are treasures.
I think if Jesus was on earth he would sit himself down in the mud with them, talk to them, love them. I think he would stand with his beautiful feet in black liquid waste for hours and tell the the good news. I think he would  kneel down amongst the garbage and the flies to let the children climb up on him and let them touch his face with their dirty hands.

If only I could have His eyes for just one second. I wonder what words he would use to describe this community?
I wonder?

In the space of 2 days

Have you ever gone through a day and not really thought about what has went on until afterwards? The other night I was sitting thinking about that day and the day before and realised what had become "normal" for us.

Within the space of 2 days......

I met a lovely lady who sold her hair for P250 so she could buy food for her baby. Priorities eh? Hair or food? The young mum was shyly giggling as she told me how she thought she looked "ugly like a boy" with her new short hair. I actually had no idea that there were people who now come around the comunity offering the women a little money for their hair. The women told me they take it and make wigs and hair extensions. I wonder how much they get sold for? I'll bets it's a lot more than P250! (3 pounds 60 pence)

We were helping some of the youth apply for college. It's been amazing to see God at work in their lives and watch Him carving out a hope and future. We never planned to send youth to college but the Lord clearly put people across out path who wanted to partner with us in this- amazing! Anyway during one of the days that Ron was taking them to their college interviews we found out about experiences they had went through that we had no idea about.
When you see the young people who have been changed by Jesus its hard to imagine the brokenness they have faced. Each one has a story of hurt in their past.It often shocks us to hear of the torture they have endured.
Can you imagine your parents keeping your sibling but abandoning you on a dump site?
How would you function if you had memories of your father measuring a rope to hang you, your sister and your mother on?
Could you even raise your head off the pillow in the mornings if you had endured rape, pregnancy and miscarriage at the age of 13?
These are real stories. They are the stories of amazing young people who somehow still love,still smile and still serve others.  

There are lots of horror stories about Tondo.Some true. Some not. We always feel pretty safe there though we do know its definitely not always a safe place to be. The other day we were reminded of that when Ron met a "security guard" at one of the potential building we were looking at to move our ministry base to. Ron said he was a nice friendly guy. Ron got the feeling he knew us and the work even though we have never met him.
So it turns out he is an assassin. A real assassin. He carries a gun and he uses it.
We found out later that he is well known in the Tondo community. Though Ron did not know it at the time, he was standing face to face with the man who murdered the father of one of the children we work with regularly. This man shot the child's father in the head in front of her and the whole family. Little Aira stopped talking for months and the whole situation was so tragic. We have watched God heal her. Ron meeting this man was a reminder of the violence the children see all the time and a reminder of how there is still much change needed in this community

One particular plot of land we were considering turned out not to be so promising! We found out that it was actually being used as a cover for something very sinister.A member of the local government (who shall remain nameless) allegedly has a right hand man who does "clean up jobs". This basically involves getting rid of anything or anyone in the way! Underneath the building we were thinking about renting is a grave yard. It turns our all of the community know that bodies that need getting rid of are buried here. It seems to be very well knows in Tondo, but no one says anything out of fear of the guy who is responsible in putting them there. So needless to say we are no longer considering this building as we would not know how the rent money would be used by this "right hand man". Another reminder of the corruption and injustice that has grips of strongholds in the community- and the country. It would all seem so hopeless without Christ. He loves justice and will keep his promises to never forsake his people.


There is much healing needed in the squatters communities. Sometimes it seems the poor get poorer and the sick get sicker. Its so hard to watch lovely people become so ill. Its so hard to be restricted by funds as to whether we can help in a case or not. Many times we can because of the kindess of people, but it's frustrating not to have a health service where money doesn't matter. I know when i was living in Scotland I just took for granted that I could do to the doctors for free whenever I needed. If that happened here so many lives would be saved.
We are trying to help one girl at the moment named Mary who is just so frail and weak. To watch someone dying before your eyes is an awful thing.Her skeletal frame seems to be fading daily and we know that without a miracle and provision she will not make it. God is the healer. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. We have witnessed miracles time and time again and know with one touch Marys body could be whole. Sickness is not Gods will. Just another hurt that the enemy uses with the poor to try and crush all hope.

I thank God that there is no situation outwith his reach. He is in control at all times. He knows what tomorrow will bring for each person in these communities. He can heal the sick. He can provide for a desperate mother. He can give hope and a future to a teenager with a broken past. He can even save an assassin and bring justice to corruption. He can.